I am sensitive...

I am sensitive. 

Always have been. I have always put too much value in what others thought about me. What others have said about me. What others have said to me. So much so, that I have spent a disproportionate amount of my time acting like I don't care. Yelling from the mountaintops that I am strong, I cannot be hurt! Professing that all that matters to me is what I think of myself. Well, that's total bullshit. I am still the nine year old who's heart breaks when I feel I am un-liked. Believe it or not, I loathe drama. I love love.  I can talk a big talk and get as nasty as the best of them, but it is an act. I can act like any character. That 'talent' was useful in building a wall against the reality of growing up. It was useful in a past career where the need to 'relate' to anyone meant life or death. However, it doesn't mean I don't feel. 

I am sensitive. 

I just got un friended on Facebook. As far as being "un friended" goes, it was a brutally honest 'unfriend'. I received a message that informed me that they were unfriending me. It wasn't a silent push of a button where you notice months later that they are a "people you may know", and you think "hunh,? I thought we WERE friends...?".  This was an honest notification. So, I sent a text, apologizing for anything I may have posted that offended and I was advised that it wasn't me....The unfriending was due to all the body obsessing and how it was in opposition to how they thought. This I can totally appreciate. EXCEPT that, that is NOT what I post.  At least, not what I thought I was posting.  I share links where beauty is being redefined. I follow pages and bloggers that support health and fitness, NOT sensationalized ridiculous body images. I agree with my now 'unfriend' that we train our bodies with a goal to be fit and strong. And yet somehow, I have been misinterpreted. 

I am sensitive. 

So now I question what the hell I am doing. I launched Jo:Moma to share tips and tricks. To redefine beauty. To change how we view exercise and food. My personal page has similar links plus family videos, zany pics, and updates of my less than perfect life. I am still the 9 year old looking to be accepted. 

I am sensitive. 

You, ... all of you, are awesome. Truly. You decide how happy you want to be.  Nobody else should have that much influence in YOUR life. So until I am the person who can confidently walk around without letting the world dictate how I feel, I will endeavour to help you be that confident, strong person. AND if that means you need to unfriend me... Do it. 

I am sensitive. 

Stay happy & healthy (I mean it)

www.jomoma.ca

AMRAP and other stuff that makes you say WTF?

 Ok, so whether you are new to the fitness world or you have kept your head low for a while, you will notice an abundance of acronyms, buzz words, diets, and trends that seem foreign. Look no further for an explanation. Consider this your fitness dictionary:

AMRAP: As Many Repetitions As Possible (feel free to groan out loud when you see this miserable direction)

WOD: Workout Of the Day. This acronym got its wings with the Crossfitters, and has since been adopted and utilized by most every gym in the free world. 

CrossFit: founded in 2000ish, it is a fitness regime and philosophy. Strength conditioning, Paleo diet and competition are all part and parcel. 

Box: a place where CrossFitters and other fitness enthusiasts work out (in the olden days these were affectionately referred to as 'gyms')

Studio: a swanky term for a small gym. 

PR/PB: Personal Record/Personal Best.  

BPM: Beats Per Minute (heart rate, not music)

BMR: Basal Metabolic Rate (the lowest amount of calories needed to sustain life)

BMI: Body Mass Index aka: Bullshit. 

Fartlek: (real word) run training where pace varies from fast to slow 

Lactic Acid: that terrible feeling in your muscles after what is deemed a "good" workout

HIIT: High Intensity Interval Training (feels like hell, but it is over quicker than the traditional workout)

DOMS: Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness.  Occurs 12-48 hours post workout. Affects how you sit on a toilet and how you brush your teeth. 

1-RM: One Rep Max. The amount of weight/resistance that can be lifted/moved one time, but not twice. A sure fire way to test what will injure you. 

RPE: Rate of Perceived Exertion. A scale of 1-10 that rates how you are feeling physically/mentally. 100% of those relaying this # to their trainer are fibbing. 

THR: Target Heart Rate. Recommended range is 60-85% of MHR: Maximum Heart Rate. It is recommended that you always have a heart rate. 

Paleo diet: popular due to the CrossFit regimen. Mimics Hunter/gatherer ancestors. Lean protein (meat/seafood), fruits and vegetables. Off limits: dairy, grains, legumes and starchy vegetables. There is nothing funny about this diet. 

Juice Cleanse diet: toted as detoxing.  Drinking only fruit and vegetable juices (sorry, you cannot juice a chicken on this diet). From this writer's perspective... It is a fad. It doesn't give you the protein and fibre your body requires. Awesome if you need to drink juice... 

Mediterranean diet: high consumption of breads and UNREFINED cereals (wheat), fruit, nuts, vegetables, fish, and cheese. Moderate amounts of wine...HEY, WAIT...SIGN ME UP.

Intermittent Fasting: newest on the scene in the diet world. A typical week would be: eat normally Monday and Tuesday, fast on Wednesday (women consume 500 calories max), regular eating Thursday, Friday fast (>500 cals), regular eating Saturday and Sunday. Here is the scoop: any time between meals is called fasting. Realistically, this diet just lowers the caloric intake for the week...if there isn't a binge that follows the fast. 

GMO: Genetically Modified Organism: altered genetics.  Aka: poison/toxin. It is not a laughing matter. 

Gluten:  it is a glue, a protein composite found in wheat and related grains (makes breads chewy). A small amount of people actually have a sensitivity to it. And an even smaller group have a serious disease (celiac).  Weight related issues can be linked to the consumption of grains. It is not specifically the gluten, but rather that the grains we consume are GMO (toxins get in the way of a properly functioning metabolism). 

WTF: an expression by a fitness enthusiast in response to an unrealistic WOD. 

And with that, TTYL.  

Stay happy & healthy

www.jomoma.ca

Not half bad, thanks Grandma.

Small print: Reminder, this blog is free to read, so if at anytime you want your money back....

So, you know those moments when you think to yourself: 'hey, I don't look half bad!'? OR, when you have made the necessary changes in your life to reverse the clock and reclaim your youthful self, but then something terrible happens...like I am talking earth shattering....

You catch your reflection in your iPad!  

Yep...you...looking down... not smiling...just...'reflecting'.  It is enough to have you google a crisis help-line but you cannot bring yourself to look down at the glowing screen anymore. Double chin (if your lucky), furrowed brow, and jowels like Winston Churchill. AND if that wasn't enough, at bedtime, when you go to brush your teeth and examine that face staring back at you, you have an Eureka moment (emphasis on the eurEEEKahhhh)... The pillow sheet marks from the morning are still visible...they aren't marks sweetheart, oxford dictionary calls em wrinkles (who likes Oxford anyway!?)

These are the moments that change behaviour. 

As you are feverishly brushing your teeth, cuz there is no freaking way coffee and wine is going to be culled from your life, you plan AND vow to do everything your Grandmother once spoke of.  You now recognize what you once believed was dimensia as true pearls of wisdom!  (I shall quote my Grandma...it has been suggested she may have lacked some 'grandmotherly' tendencies). 

"Stand like you are bought and paid for!" (yes, we can all agree we are NOT property, but the message is gold). By standing straight, the work gravity has done on your 'girls' looks less influential.  Your tummy flattens out (slightly), and your jaw is less buried in your cheeks,..hello jawline! And FYI, confidence is sexy (nobody needs to know it is feigned). 

"Blue, ... I should paint the ceiling blue" (apparently a thought my Granmother had whilst on her back with my Grandfather).. Gross, sure, but let's face it, having children is hereditary:  if my Grandma hadn't had kids (which involves the fore mentioned) then chances are my Mom wouldn't have... Anywho, I digress from the point... 

Clearly the position (on back) not only gives you decorating insight, it erases that double chin! Now, when you are on your iPad (please! You didn't think I was referring to Grandma sex!?) your reflection will be much more Vogue and less Winston. 

"Never let them see you cry".  How is this a helpful 'beauty' tip!? Wellllllll....  If you have ever seen me cry, it involves excess snot, swelling of my eyelids, and red blotchy patches from my neck up. Sure there are glamorous criers (my sis-in-law and Hollywood actresses) but they are few and far between, and I am blocking them from having any further 'tips'. If the pillow sheet marks were enough to send you into a tizzy, then looking like a boxer post bout will not tickle your fancy. 

Invest in big necked t-shirts (dark in colour). You can hide your weepy face and blow your nose in the shirt without being detected (light colour shirts will show snot...test cases have proven this). ADDITIONALLY, do not go to a mirrored environment until you can take a deep breath without it catching and you can talk like you do not have severe sinus congestion. By that point, the swelling will now only plump out the crows feet, the eyes will have the slightest of sparkle and there will be colour in your cheeks. If they didn't see you cry, then they only believe you to be bright eyed! 

Voila, changed. And now I am pleased to return to my feeling of not half bad. 

Signed, Nikela's granddaughter. 

Stay happy & healthy

www.jomoma.ca

  

Spring cleaning my head space

Sometimes this blog has little to nothing to do with health and fitness...unless you consider that letting your thoughts out is a healthy way to clean out your head space.  

In no particular order...things that I question...today, and other days...and certainly not a complete compendium...

I truly dislike the qualifiers. You know, the: "you look good for having had four kids", "that's great for a non-runner", "not bad for a nearly 40 year old". Say what!? Sooo, if I hadn't had four kids, if I were a 'runner', or if I was 20 something I would be less fantastic? Here's the thing, the 'qualifier' makes the entire statement seem less genuine, and far from complimentary.  Take your qualifier and...

Why are so many people afraid of change? The only thing permanent IS change. So, accept it. Embrace it. Love it. Being afraid of change doesn't make it go away. Just saying. 

Sugar is poison. True story. It fuels cancer. It is addictive. It effs up your hormones and makes you fat. It is a DRUG. It should be a criminal offence when it is an additive/ingredient in the foods we buy. 

What is it with moles? I don't mean the blind rodent, I am referring to the skin growths. Apparently these lil beauties appear in the first 30 years of life...well, I am 9 years past my first 30 and they are still coming. So, I have freckles, I am a red head, I stand at 6',.... My parents truly whipped up a recipe not many have replicated.  So why do I also need moles? 

Being a parent of a teenager truly kicks one's self esteem in the a$$. If I hadn't already thought what I did occasionally was 'stupid' or that what I was wearing was 'embarrassing', I need only to look at my first born to bring my elevated self love back down to miniscule levels. (Seriously, what's wrong with wearing my fedora with runners?!). 

Speaking of hats. Love em! Nothing hides bad hair better than a ball cap. That or staying under the covers all day. 

Cortisol levels increase with stress. Higher levels of cortisol correlate with weight gain. Orgasams produce oxytocin which decreases cortisol. Hmmm, sooooo, if one plus one is two... Then orgasams should equal weight loss no!? 

Love yourself. It is the toughest thing we can do. It is easy to love and see the good in others, but we know the darkest corners of ourselves and often let that taint our self love. The dark stuff is a part of you. You don't have to be it, but you need to accept it. YOU ARE WORTH IT. 

What should I have for dinner.....?

Stay happy & healthy

www.jomoma.ca

All this body love talk...

I am absolutely committed to changing how we define beauty. I am disgusted with media and how it fuels women's self loathing and low self esteem. So, it stands to reason that I am a supporter of the 'Love your body' movement, in fact, give me a podium and buckle up. 

However, let me be clear. Love your body, to me, means that you take care of it. It means that you fuel it, move it, and rest it appropriately. If by taking the best care of your body (love) and you remain a size 18, who the hell cares, you have every right to love how it looks, feels, and works. BUT if you do nothing, if you put junk in your body, if you lay on your couch, and if you stay up all hours to catch up on tv, texts or what have you, you do not love your body. 

When you are reading this, do not infer that I dislike fat people. Because that simply is not true.  Also note, there are 'skinny' people who are just as guilty of not loving the temple that they walk around in. What I am saying is: We have one body. Take care of it.  

When you love your self, it shows.  You shine from the inside out.  You attract other beautiful people (read: energetic, happy, healthy, self starters...), and you feel GOOD. That beauty does not have a size attached. It has a behaviour. Beautiful is as beautiful does. 

So when the 'love your body movement' moves you, please DO.  Please love your body. Adore the machine that allows you to enjoy life. Shower yourself in love (real food, real exercise, real rest). 

Stay happy and healthy,

www.jomoma.ca

Living life like a Movie Star

You wake up in the morning, hair perfect, make-up still applied flawlessly, and your love interest is inches from your minty mouth whispering sweet nothings, your perky boobs defy your age, while the coffee is brewing in the kitchen. 

Haaaaaaaaaaa, ya, ok.  Let's take Hollywood out of this scenario and add some reality:

You wake up, ughh, your not sure if you have a ponytail in or if your hair has actually matted itself at the back. Your make-up, if you hadn't removed it the night before, is perfectly applied to the pillow sheet.  That person in the bed with you (if it's not the three year old, or the 4 legged child, but rather the person involved with the creation of the said three year old), will not be coming in for some morning smooching. Really. You know you could stand to brush your own teeth, never mind them. As for the silver screen breasts that stand at attention when laying face up, yours are tucked nicely into your armpits (a 'perk', or not, for the big chested). You could really use a coffee...with any luck Starbucks delivers.  

Here is the scoop. Perfection is not the Hollywood version. Perfection is having a reason to get up. Perfection is getting the knots out... Out of your hair, the sheets, your back...your life. Perfection is the reflection in the mirror of that person who battles and wins...ties...or at the very least continues to battle. 

If you have somebody to share your bed with, you are very fortunate indeed.  If you have hair that can get messed, and breasts still attached you are blessed with good health. If you woke up in the morning, you already won. 

Remove the idea of lipgloss and fresh breath at 6am, and get a coffee maker with a timer. Sighhh, such is a glamorous life. 

Stay happy & healthy

www.jomoma.ca 

Mom, Mama, Mum, Mommy, Ma, Mother..

...whatever name you use, it is the one word that means 'hero' to most who use it. 

There is not a job on this planet that requires so much from somebody with zero financial gains. 24 hour shifts, where the expectation is that you are the everything.  The clean-up committee, nursing staff, financial advisor, project manager, public relations, social organizer, boss, subordinate, psychologist, jail keeper, judge, chauffeur, administrative assistant, coach, cheerleader, and punching bag. 

Zero money. But what you do get, is perspective, knowledge, lessons, a broken heart, pride, fear, elation, disappointment, exhaustion, broke, worried, and the ability to define love. 

Mothers would never exchange the above for a paycheck. The little person who wakes in the middle of the night comforted only by you. The wave from the stage during a concert. The searching in the stands for your eye contact when they score a goal. The broken heart that needs your hug and words of wisdom. The phone call to say hi. It is priceless and worth every sleepless night, snotty nose, load of laundry, and sacrifice. It is being called 'Mom' by a person who is love. 

So Moms, while you are busy wondering what happened to your body, why you have very little time to take care of you... Those people that call you Mom, know you are the most beautiful person in the world. 

Happy Mother's Day

Stay Happy & Healthy

www.jomoma.ca