Being happy for others

When I was a little girl, ten or so years ago (writer's privilege), I was envious. Envious of everyone that could do something I could not OR had something I did not. It was torturous. There was always somebody better. There was always somebody with more. That feeling robbed me of so many incredible moments. I wanted to be like someone other than myself. I didn't see my successes because I was too busy coveting others. 

I was competitive and self deprecating. I wanted the awards and accolades. I wanted the 'stuff'.  I wanted to be seen as successful....As the best. I wanted others to recognize me! 

I based MY worth on what OTHERS thought.

I am not the envious little girl anymore. I changed.

Not overnight...but gradually.

 I learned that waiting and working for recognition gave others the control of my happiness. I learned that I had to be the one to acknowledge me. I learned that my most successful moments are not trophy or press release material and may never be known by anyone other than me. And I learned that it is rewarding to be genuinely happy for those that ARE being recognized. 

And I have so many opportunities to be just that. 

 I am an extremely fortunate person. So many of my friends and family are the cream of the crop. They are hall of famers in sport, they have parks and trophies named after them, they are Olympians, professional coaches, professional athletes, professors, performers, authors, educators, first responders, trail blazers, business owners and heroes. They are frequently awarded for being such AND I get to know them. I get to be happy for them and that feeling lasts longer than any award I have ever received. 

The company I keep is to be envied, and I couldn't be happier. 

S.